Movie Matinee Madness - Fifty Shades Freed

Happy Valentine's Day, it's time for the final and overdue instalment of the Fifty Shades trilogy, Fifty Shades Freed. E.L James books have now reached their climax (fancy marketing distributors) and with the soundtrack coming out last week (see here for more on amazing film soundtracks) the movie acts as a giant marketing vehicle for the soundtrack and maybe Audi as well.



I have to admit I am eyeballs deep in Dornan's devilish good The Fall with Gillian Anderson and loving it sick, so it is hard seeing Dornan as such a dull cleanly shaved bondage lover.

Dakota Johnson is horrific (again) as Ana Steele-Grey, yes we see a wedding at the start of the film, with, you guessed it a song filled montage.

Montage's are common in the final piece to the Shades puzzle. The drama is brief and Rita Ora is painfully bad as as Mia Grey, Dornan AKA Mr Grey's adopted sister.

His past from Detroit comes to bit Dornan on the butt? Yes we do see his perfect bubble butt in this edition, no sausage but we are treated to a gentleman who does believe in a Brazilian. Nice.

So the film, it's like a trashy soap opera not a big budget Hollywood film (that said the first two have made close to a billion dollars) or a Marvel superhero film.

Fifty Shades Freed was never going to get good reviews, it's more event cinema. Marketing has been done well, I after The Fall have also fallen in love with Jamie Dornan however I will be happy NEVER to see Dakota Johnson in another film or TV show for (hopefully) a while.

2.5 Stars, it's finally over, but for those looking for more sex this film seems to have a lot more particularly in the first half.